Sunday, April 3, 2011

JOURNEY



This post has been published by me as a part of the Blog-a-Ton 19; the nineteenth edition of the online marathon of Bloggers; where we decide and we write. To be part of the next edition, visit and start following Blog-a-Ton.




The little wooden boats, the ones that gently rocked when you blew at them, cost thirty Rupees at the village fair . Rickety little things, that never left shore enough to touch another. This one was different though. The minute he clutches at it’s smooth, symmetrical polish – scented edges , he knew. He also knew it was not to be owned. The setting sun rippling on the river, the perfect postcard background for the grand launch; he let it go – envisioning it’s grand travels along it’s puny path on the mighty river.
And it travelled. It touched Benares and carried a whiff of the evening “aarti”. It touched Bengal, and the “baul” song reverberated in intoxicated rhythms from it’s then ripped sails. Somewhere in Howrah, a girl touched it during her late afternoon splash. And she saw the ‘pujari ’in his pot bellied , ‘tilak’- in –place splendor. She felt the cool breeze of Rishikesh , just a draft – but nonetheless. And then it stole away, leaving behind the illiterate girl with a glimpse of a highly coloured , high school geography book dream.
The shepherd found it in some crevice of the almost frozen river. Motion was difficult then. The smooth flowing meanderings replaced by icy obstacles. He breathed in long forgotten summer dreams in its hollowed length. It was like the last time he had picked mangoes in the orchard, he could still taste it on his tongue tips, the uniquely mango-ish juicy sweetness. The thrill of secretive climbing of forbidden trees.
And having delivered that last smile from far-off lands ; it breathed it’s last in the icicle cave. A furry creature scurried forth. Somewhere there were meadows with enough sun and trees.


The fellow Blog-a-Tonics who took part in this Blog-a-Ton and links to their respective posts can be checked here. To be part of the next edition, visit and start following Blog-a-Ton.

10 comments:

T F Carthick said...

Beautiful imagination. Liked the concept a lot. Wish you had elaborated and written more though. Or maybe render it in poetry form. Lot of scope in there.

s said...

Wow....This was so innovative !!!!! I agree with 'TF' above, it would have been much better, were it longer....
Stil, I really liked this beautifully fresh idea :)

the critics said...

nice....thought in different manner there

Someone is Special said...

Beautiful.. I too agree with 'The Fool' and 'Shilpa Nair', a fresh concept but it should have elaborated a little.. anyhow I loved it. SmileS... mine is a dream a journey of...

Someone is Special

Miss D said...

It almost felt like I was being shown a video!

What a vivid description! Lovely!

All the best!

Ona said...

thank u all for ur feedback..much appreciated...and yes i agree i should have taken this further, probably will...this was actually written in a class where our prof suggested we write a piece that was post modern from our point of view, hence the shortness. but now i feel the confidence to continue. : )
special thanks to polo for the inspiration.

Vinay Leo R. said...

very vivid descriptions, and could imagine it in my mind. lovely prose, and yes, would have been better if a little longer..

please change your timestamp to April 3, 2011. as per rules of Blog-a-Ton, I shouldn't be accepting older entries, but for this time, I'm making an exception. Votes for your post from others will not count unless your timestamp is changed :)

Here's My Blog-a-Ton Journey

Ona said...

thank u Vinay...since it was my first time at Blog -A-Ton i was a little confused about the rules...i have made the change...and will take care next time...: )

aativas said...

What a journey indeed!

Sureindran said...

A beautiful story. And a different point of view. Your detailed narration was a satisfying read.

Sureindran
www.sureindran.com
Journey